Wanna Hear About My Life In Sweden?

I have been in Sweden for over two and a half months now. I thought I posted a link for everyone to read my new blog. But I didn't. Here is the address in case anyone wants to read my other blog.


http://swedishlifeforme.blogspot.se/

My Final Day in America

I want to explain and tell everyone how I feel before leaving for Sweden. I'm not really scared or nervous. I feel like it's another trip that I take with my mom and close friend. I am excited to meet my host family and my host sister. I never would have thought this day would come. I never thought that this day would have come. 

It is sad though to have to say good-bye to everyone. I never would have thought I would had to do this so soon. I know that I wouldn't want to say good-bye to my father or my mother or my brothers. But I have to so I can learn and grow. 

It's The Final Countdown

With my days in America coming to an end, the stress bar has been lifted almost to the threshold maximum. I have never been so excited in my life, but also never been so scared. I have never done anything like this in my life and I am glad that I have friends and family who are backing me up in my decision on doing this. 

I figured I'd spending my remaining doing things as if everything was normal and nothing was changing. 

• I have my nephew's birthday I am going to.
• Baking about 50-60 cupcakes.
• Making food for almost 60 or more people.
• Cleaning my whole house.
• Doing clean-up yard work.
• Throwing a leaving party.
• Organizing and moving things around my room.
• Organizing my suitcases and carry-on bags.
• Waiting for my tickets and itinerary. 
• Helping my dad and his friend with yard work.
• Packing things away while packing my suitcases.
• Hanging out with friends and family.

It might seem like a lot, but at the same time it might seem like it's not a lot. I can do most of this in a day if I kept it pretty quick and did a good job. The party and making food is for a different day though. So I don't have to worry about that just yet. Everything else is on the agenda for getting done tonight and tomorrow. But I like doing all of these things. It helps keep my mind off of thinking about leaving my family and friends behind. 

Sitting here listening to my music, I wonder about my host family. Will they like me? Will they think that I am strange? What if they don't like me? What do it do to impress them? I can't think of these things... It will make me even more stressed out. And I can't handle the stress I've got as it is. 

As the final countdown begins, I surround myself with everyone that I know I am going to love and miss. I know that when I get there, I will have so much to say, but they're so far away.

14 Days Left

As I sat outside in the nice hot sun, I thought for a few moments and realized that I have two weeks left to spend in America before leaving to spend a year of my life in Sweden. I sat in the sun thinking of things that I could do with the remainder of my time. My list came short of a kids' Christmas list. I thought of so many different things that I wanted to do. But sadly knew I couldn't do them. So I had to scratch most of my list off and stay to the basics. 

• Visit my family and friends
• Pack everything that I need
• Get some needed sleep
• Study more Swedish
• Talk with other Swedish exchange students

My parents decided that throwing a party a few days before I leave would be the best way to say good-bye to everyone. I have so many people that I wish I could just never say good-bye to and have them come with me. But I knew that they couldn't leave and do the same thing as me. 

I think that having the party right before I leave is a wonderful idea. I can see and talk to everyone within a few days period of leaving. It felt nice to think that I would have so many people that I love and know come and see me before I leave.

I can remember having 58 days left to spend and do whatever I wanted to do before I left. With 14 days left, I feel almost paralyzed with so many different emotions. I want to cry because I am nervous and scared. I want to jump with joy because I have never been so excited in my life. I wanted to sit down and breath because my anxiety levels were sky high. I knew that this was typically normal for any exchange student. 

I just have to keep calm and be an exchange student. 

Going Through Changes

I've noticed some strange things in the past few days. One of those things is concentration. I noticed that I can't sit around and play video games for long because I will end up dying more, I make silly mistakes, and I can't remember what I was doing maybe on a certain level or area. Usually I can defeat a game within a few hours. Recently, it's been taking me longer. I figured out why I wasn't able to be my normal self. My brain is stuck thinking about what is going to happen in Sweden. The memories, friends, place, and things I will visit, make, and see. 

Also I've noticed that I have become more stressed. After having to start pack for a year, start telling your friends and family good-bye, picking out paint for my room for the new host kid, buy a folder to hold important documents, talking to your host family about customs and rules, get your host family gifts that are amazing, the wait of finding out your flight and visa information, and the wait of the departure date, It's all stressing and at the same time exciting. 

A final thing that I have noticed is that I am longing for acceptance. People that I have known for years aren't taking me leaving for exchange the way I wish they would take it. I wish they would understand that this is the best thing for me and it will be an amazing experience for me. I am going to have the time of my life and I will meet some pretty amazing people along the way. So why wouldn't they accept it?

Honesty Truly is the Best Policy

I never truly took it that seriously that being honest with someone could truly help you. I learned my lesson with it and I'm glad that I did. Maybe next time I will be a little smarter and actually tell my parents what I'm doing, instead of sneaking around.

For the past weekend, my parents and family friends, Tim and Kim Aldighetti, have been camping at a campground that we usually go to. We made s'mores, breakfast, and dinners together. We usually do things like that together. But last night was a little different. Tim A. had the idea of slow cooking a pork loin covered in his secret recipe, and my dad slow cooking chuck roast covered in garlic pepper rub. 

We spend hours and hours working on watching the meat and cooking vegetables. Finally 6:10 p.m rolled around, the food was finally done. Tim, Kim, Meredith (Tim & Kim's sons girlfriend), my father and mother, and I sat around the picnic table covered in the meat, corn, baked potatoes sliced with butter, squash with butter and maple syrup, and grand rolls with honey butter. As we sat there and ate the large and somewhat intimidating meal, I received at text from a friend. They wanted me to go into town and spend sometime with them. Me being me, said yes.

I told my parents that I was going to the movies to go see a very close friend. I knew if my parents knew what I was actually going to do, they wouldn't let me and I wouldn't want to not go and see the friend. I had my parents all convinced, my father drove me to the friends house, around 7:20. I walked towards the door, my father sat in his truck... waiting. Another person I knew opened the door and sealed my fate as he shut the door. I gave my friend a hug, even though we had seen each other on Thursday. I looked out the window to see my father still sitting and waiting in his truck. 

As me and my friends hung out, time was slowly ticking away, but I was having fun as it did. Finally midnight came, everyone was tired. My friend and I went upstairs to go and sleep, as the other person stayed downstairs. We laid together and talked for awhile. Finally falling asleep what seemed like an eternity later. 

I awoke at little after 5:00 a.m I knew that my parents would be driving through soon to go home and get ready for the day. I texted my father telling him that I had been up since 4:15 a.m, with the original friend I said I was with, because a health condition of hers had started to reoccur. He said that he would be around at 5:35 or so. I told him that it was all good. 

Once my father and mother picked me up, the interrogation had begun. They both asked me a million questions in under 5 minutes. I had to think of lies to get them off of my back. I ran my mouth like a motorboat trying to think of things to say. Once we were back to my house, my father went on Facebook to check if the original friend had said anything about being together and/or the thing that we were supposed to be doing. He quickly realized that no we hadn't been hanging out and that I was lying.

He looked at me and asked only an one word question. And it was,

"Why?"

I looked at both my parents and told them the truth. I had to it was the right thing and I didn't want my parents not trusting me to do anything with my friends anymore. When I finally explained everything in detail to my father, he had a changed expression on his face and said,

"I'm glad that you told me the truth, but I'm mad that you had to lie about it just to go and see a different friend."

I knew exactly where he was coming from with it too. I knew that telling him what had actually gone down, was the best and only option I really had. After telling him everything, I felt way better. 

I just want to throw this out there, this isn't a punishment from my parents. I wanted to tell everyone this story because it made me feel better that I didn't have to lie to make my father and mother believe that I was being a good kid. I might have at first, but I quickly realized that telling the truth got me and my respect level a whole lot further.

Realization

Last night seemed to bring many things to me. The biggest of them all was realization. I noticed that it was June 16th. I only had a half of a month left until it was July. After that, time would go by like nothing. My party would roll around then I would only 3 days left in the States. I thought of the people that would miss me, the birthdays, sports events, holidays, and parties I would miss. It might not seem worth it to many people, but I knew it is way worth it.

I realized that even though July 31st may seem far away, it truly isn't. I still have time to spend with friends and family, I can still have time to get ready emotionally and physically, I can learn more about what I will be doing next year, and I can have time to be ready for the adventure that is coming towards me.

I didn't want to leave so soon, but I know that I need to explore the world and see what else I could do. I'll be in Sweden for almost a year, then I'll be going on a Euro-Tour to see many different countries within Europe before leaving to come back to the States to see my friends and family. I think that going to Sweden, meeting different exchange students from different countries, going on the Euro-Tour, and visiting the different places, will open my mind to many different ideas. Maybe I will move to Europe. Maybe I will just visit Europe. Who knows? 

Experiencing what I am going to do is going to be a life time in less than a year. So I am going to make sure that I live like there is no tomorrow and make sure that I have fun doing whatever I am doing, I'll experience everything that I can, and try things that I would never think of doing.